Computers should make Computer Noises -- beep, boop, click, clack, & whir!
The sounds a computer makes are part of its soul. No sound? No soul.
I am going to put forth an idea.
And idea which I feel so strongly about… that I am willing to purchase a significant amount of dirt, rent a bulldozer to help shape the dirt into a hill, name the hill after that idea, climb to the top of said hill… and die on it.
Because it’s Sunday. And why not.
That idea:
Computers have gotten too gosh darned quiet! Any respectable computer should make computer noises! Beeps and boops and clicks and whirs!
I know, I know!
Many of you absolutely love your silent computers. With whisper quiet cooling fans — or no fans at all.
But I’m here to tell you, right now, that computers should make sounds. Computer sounds. The sounds of an individual computer… are part of the feel of that computer. Part of its identity.
Taking away all of the noises that a good computer makes… that’s sort of like listening to a Frank Sinatra album… where Frank doesn’t sing. Or eating a hamburger… where the delicious all-beef patty is replaced by something made out of plants. It’s not cool, and I don’t like it.
Those of us who used computers during the 1980s (and 1990s) know the joy of hearing a hard drive access… or a floppy drive reading data… or an analogue modem connecting… or (one of my favorites) the “KER-CHUNK!” of throwing a power switch.
Deeply satisfying sounds. Sounds that you feel way down in your soul.
Taking away those sounds strips away some of the personality of what made “Personal Computers” so gosh-darned personal.
Listen to all of the following sounds. Then tell me I’m wrong. Tell me these sounds did not bring you joy. I dare ya.
Keyboard should make keyboard sounds!
Modems should make modem sounds!
Floppy drives should make floppy drive sounds!
Hard drives should make hard drive sounds!
The sounds of an IBM 5170 (powering on, fan, hard drive, the works)!
See what I mean?
Soul. Personality. Feeling.
You can keep your 0 decibel, fanless machine, thank you very much. I’ll be over here enjoying the sweet, sweet sounds of a real computer.
Oh man, early IBM PCs and compatibles make some of the best boot up sounds ever. The sounds of a Model F or Model M? Best darn keyboard noises ever. The only downside to computer noises is that my parents knew when I was trying to sneak and play a game after lights out.
Oh yeah, I loved the awesome floppy disk sounds.
https://youtu.be/Oym7B7YidKs