Apple Police arrest man for "malicious sideloading of DOOM"

If convicted of “Malicious, Intentional Sideloading” he faces life in Apple Prison (tm).

A representative from the Apple Police Department has confirmed to The Lunduke Journal that they have arrested a Seattle area man for the crime of “malicious, premeditated sideloading of unauthorized software.”

“Thank heavens our new Apple Police (tm) were there to protect this man from himself,” stated Tim Cook, Apple CEO and Chief of Apple Police. “Can you imagine a more damaging and dangerous act than the intentional sideloading of software onto a Mac or iPhone? Sideloading! Terrifying!”

At the time of publication, details are scarce. What The Lunduke Journal has been able to learn is that the man in question attempted to install a “non-authorized” version of the classic “DOOM” video game on his M1 Macbook Air.

If convicted of “Malicious, Intentional Sideloading” he faces life in Apple Prison (tm).

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