California outlaws computers that are "too fun" [SATIRE]
The governor of California announced today that he will be immediately be signing a new law aimed at limiting computers deemed to be "too fun".
"California is committed to fighting the pandemic of fun computers currently plaguing our state," declared the Governor in a statement to The Lunduke Journal. "Climate change. Discrimination. Covid. These are some pretty scary words. And, with this new law banning all fun computers, we are taking bold steps where we can mention those words in a press release."
Newly outlawed "fun computers" include any computers with one or more of the following:
Processors that are too fast
Monitors with refresh rates that do not give you a headache
Keyboards with keys are are "pretty clicky"
PC cases that "look rad" or have "cool LEDs"
Any Operating System other than "Windows 10 Business Cubicle Edition"
In order to fully comply with the new law, Dell Computer is shipping a new desktop, only available in California, dubbed the "Boring As Heck PC". This new line contains absolutely nothing worth getting excited about and has removed every feature that might accidentally make a person smile.